Rifftrax Kickstarter 2025: STOP! In the Name of Time

 

Well, Rifftrax is moving on up when it comes to getting movies for live shows.

After getting Point Break with REAL ACTORS, they've done it again with Time Cop with Jean Claude Van Damme. It's a cheesy 90s sci-fi movie, but it did fine. It's almost a cult classic.
This time, they're asking 350 thousand dollars. Once again, they hit that goal in less than two days.
This time, I decided to splurge to get my name on the screen...just once. It also means I get a pin, shirt, blu-ray...and a Christmas ornament of a lion who says he can eat candy.
Yes, from THAT cheesy Christmas short they had a while ago. 
WORTH IT!

So, what is this "time cop"?

Actually, it's a more physical version of Time Chasers. Jean-Claude plays a guy whose wife is killed. He later becomes a police officer of sorts, going back in the past to find people from the present to change history and also profit from it. The bad guy is a senator called Aaron McComb, played by Ron Silver. He figures time travel is a great way to get fast cash for his presidential campaign. Thing is, wouldn't money from the past be worth less in the present? Too bad they didn't consider that idea.
Anyway, it explains why Ron Silver (the actor) was the Big Bad in that Heat Vision and Jack pilot.

By the way, Time Cop did become a TV show three years later, but the plot involved stopping people who used time travel for evil means. No plot about changing the past to suddenly get five mil for last-minute ads. 

Rifftrax will tape the show in Nashville on June 26th, then show it twice on August 14 and 19th. Since it's close to two hours, it's likely the event will be just the movie with very short pre-movie banter. I am guessing we'll get outtakes in the blu-ray. 
So far, the Super-Deluxe Rewards have sold out, but it's likely some will be replenished. The real issue is which stretch goals will be offered....and which recent movies will be riffed by the boys. Will it include Dune, Part Two, or maybe (we dare you) Wicked? 
Someone also suggested pummeling Madame Web...but Bridget and Mary Jo riffs it.

If you'd like to donate, visit the Kickstarter website.

Rifftrax Looks At An MST3K Live Show

Way back in 2017, Mystery Science Theater 3000 had a live tour and featured two movies. One was an old favorite, Eegah. The other was yet another European movie that tries to profit from the super hero fad.

Some are familiar with Rifftrax offerings like Superargo and Supersonic Man, and MST's showing of Puma Man. Then we have a new addition from Rifftrax called Argoman. It's about a British guy who has super powers but uses them to get chicks and steal stuff that he hopes no one will miss. You know, like the Mona Lisa.
Not exactly defending truth, justice and the European way.
The cut of his costume is also a bit too suggestive.
Anyway, this was part of MST3K's live tour to plug its return on Netflix. This clip is from its stop in Atlanta, where they do a fashion show of robes.

So, what IS this movie?

Well, what if Austin Powers had super powers but wasn't so...average-looking (as English guys go)?
He apparently has tele-kinesis that helps him pick up chicks, literally. He also has cameras at the places where his other girlfriends are. It's that pervy. 
Oh, and he loses his powers for six hours after he has sex.

Meanwhile, some woman named Jenabell, Queen of the World, steals a crown then decides to rob a bank in France...and give people the cash to ruin the economy, sort of. She's really after a large diamond that will also ruin the economy and threaten the world. 

Naturally, they confront each other and it quickly becomes a live version of Penthouse Forum. It doesn't slow down her plans for conquest. She wants to show Su-maru how it should be done, like recruiting  several important figures to do her bidding.

Still, Argoman, aka Super Hugh Hefner, defeats Jenabell but is also accused of stealing the same crown Jenabell took. Let's just say he may or may not return it.

It's too bad it wasn't part of the Gauntlet or Season 13, but maybe it worked better as a live show than on Netflix.

Now it's riff time:

The movie takes a jaunt around London.
Sure it's old and wet but at least it's also very brown.

Argoman wastes his telekinetic powers to grab a hovercraft pilot
Watch out for Pumaman

He enjoys a kiss with the sexy pilot
You taste like Jim Leyland

Jenabell gets the big diamond
I'll be almost as powerful as Taylor Swift

Argoman "fights"
He makes Adam West look like Donnie Yen.

There's also riffs on Carmen San Diego, Mr. Bean, Hunger Games, Godzilla, and Johnny Quest. 
It's available at rifftrax.com.

The Last Picture Show In Downtown Reno

 

Hundreds of theaters showed the latest over-priced holiday movie, Red One. This was not one of them.

The Cinemark Century Riverside 12 in downtown Reno showed its last movies this past November 14. The movie chain had announced a while ago it would end its lease at North Sierra Street after losing customers to its two other Cinemark theaters. The appeal of watching a movie near the Truckee River just faded after more than 20 years.

Here are some pictures, like the schedule of the last set of showings:

a sign for a movie that is never coming:

a sign of what is not to come...

and of course, the final ticket...

There wasn't a massive number of customers hoping to get one last look at the theater. Maybe it's because hardly anyone knew about it. The website barely mentioned it but certainly said one theater was going to get improvements including an XD screen. There should have been more publicity before the big closing night. 

I've been there more often than the other two Cinemarks, only because it's closer to my house. If there are any special memories about the place, there was the time I saw a special Rifftrax showing the height of COVID. There have been some "accidental" private screenings, but the biggest was when a sneak preview got cancelled because the movie file was damaged. Got two free tickets I still haven't used. 

At least it's good news for the Galaxy theater near the Nugget (also a former Cinemark theater) in downtown Sparks. It has some advantages including premium screens along with beer and wine. The Cinemark in Reno was old-fashioned as far as offerings were concerned. Another Cinemark two miles away has beer and wine plus self-serve soda. The writing was on the screen.

Hopefully someone will bring back movies to downtown Reno. The city needs more investment in downtown, and maybe another Galaxy or even AMC will help the area. It'll be a long time, though.

Two Movies That Will Never Reach Reno

 

Recently, I spent three days to meet one of my favorite liberal talk show hosts, Stephanie Miller, and tour the Intuit Dome (aka Sofi Stadium, Jr.). 

Also, I fit in two movies, neither of which will reach Reno in favor of bigger movies like Venom, Smile 2 and (STILL) Beetlejuice Beetlejuice. That'll be followed by Hugh Grant as a horror star, and (very soon) a different look at the Yellow Brick Road.

The first one is Juror Number Two, which might be Clint Eastwood's last movie. It's about a guy named Justin (Nicholas Hoult) who's been chosen for jury duty in a murder trial. The defendant is accused is beating his girlfriend to death near a road house. However, Justin suspects he may have killed her by running her down in his car.

Could he tell someone? A lawyer friend of his advises against it, since Justin is a recovering alcoholic. The prosecutor, played by Toni Collette, is relying on this case in her bid to become District Attorney.
The movie centers on whether Justin will confess, or somehow avoid saying anything.

The movie is actually a nice, straight-forward legal drama. It shows what happened, through both sides. The jury gets tainted a bit when it revealed one of the jurors is a former police detective. Another juror thinks the defendant is guilty because he has a gang tattoo. A third has some medical knowledge that suggests the victim was killed in another way. All the time, Justin tells his fellow jurors to be careful before rendering a verdict. His guilt doesn't overcome him,
As for the prosecutor, she actually wants to get to the bottom of the case, and does some legwork thanks to the ex-detective.

Hoult does a good job as the conflicted man who wonders if he's really guilty, but also wonders if there is a way out. After all, there's a baby on the way and he can't break up his family. This is especially true in the final act when the jury is sent to the scene of the crime. The way he recalls what really happens leads to a very interesting final scene.

The real mystery is why Warner Brothers decided to show this movie at only a few screens nationwide, including a few in L-A. It's got a wide release overseas, so it could break even by the time it finally reaches Max and HBO in late December. If this was given a thousand screens in the US, at least it would show some respect for Clint. 

Then there's this movie, which will be on Netflix in a few days. Some lucky people got to see it in theaters, but the best way was at the Egyptian on Hollywood Boulevard.

Anyway, Emilia Perez made a big splash in Cannes last Spring. The plot is wild enough: in Mexico City, an attorney named Rita (Zoe Saldana) is hired by a cartel leader named Manitas Del Monte to make him disappear...then get a new life as a woman named Emilia Perez. She is played by trans actress Karla Sofia Gascon. The transformation from drug thug to fashionable woman is incredible, as is her performance.
While Emilia wants a new life, leaving her past life behind isn't so easy. There is the matter of Emilia's wife Jessi (Selena Gomez) and two kids. They're sent to Switzerland for a while, then sent back to Mexico. There, Jessi meets Emilia as Manitas' "cousin". 
Emilia finds a new purpose organizing a charity that recovers people who have disappeared and maybe killed by drug dealers. She actually gets a lot of praise, and also meets a widow who's glad her husband is dead. It's not long before they become a couple. 

The movie has some incredible songs and musical numbers that work as commentary of the plot. The best one is where Rita comments on how Emilia is using the elite for her gains, while it hopes its financial help will wash away their sins. Saldana is incredible here, and shows she should look into getting in more musicals. 

Meanwhile, Jessi is having the time of her life with a man named Gustavo. When she says she'll marry him, Emilia's jealousy sets off some tragic events that even includes her kidnapping

The movie earned Best Actress honors for the four main females, along with the Jury Prize. It's expected to contend for Best International Film come award season. The Egyptian gave away a poster which "summarized" the movie in 35 images. 
This also should have gotten exposure in theaters. It's one thing to see it on Netflix, but another on the big screen. Put it in 800 theaters nationwide for three weeks, then on Netflix. An upcoming biopic on Maria Callas should also get that attention, since some film fans say it'll get Angelina Jolie back in awards season.

By the way, the theater website says it will be shown in 35 mm one more time in November, then an appearance from director Jacques Audiard in December. If you are in town, GO!

Reviewing Two Movies On The Past And Future

 

October is fading away, but November will kick off Awards Season with much better movies. We're due to see the process of choosing a pope, an unusual musical, and some Russians trying to cancel a marriage (and not succeeding too well on that).

Some interesting movies have gotten lost in the shuffle, and this is my way of commenting on them. The first is My Old Ass with Aubrey Plaza and newcomer Maisy Stella. They technically play the same person, someone named Elliott. Maisy is the 18 year old version who's looking forward to leaving her cranberry farm in Ontario for adventures in Toronto. She'd especially would like to get away from her quirky family, including a brother who is Saoirse Ronan's number one fan.

Anyway, after drinking some very potent mushroom tea, she meets her 39 year old self, played by Plaza. Young Elliott is stunned, and the movie never explains how this happens. Plaza did play a woman who was up for some time travel in Safety Not Guaranteed. Maybe that character got separated from Mark Duplass and wound up in the past....where she gives birth to Elliott's mom. Maybe Future Elliott got a hold of another form of time travel and we have this meeting.

The point is, Future Elliott is careful not to mention too much of the future, but does tell Young Elliott to stay close to her family. BUT she should also avoid getting involved with anyone named Chad.
Both Elliotts do stay in contact for a while via cell, and Young Elliott does meet a guy named Chad played by Percy Hynes White.
Despite the fact Young Elliott is attracted to women, including a hot and heavy romance, she's drawn to Chad. He's a decent guy, actually, and a good mechanic. So what's the problem?

Well, Old Elliott is suddenly unreachable, so Young Elliott is on her own. That actually makes sense because Young Elliott might make the wrong choice and Earth blows up. Not here, though.
She's also thrown for a loop by some decisions her family makes. Her dad just says she shouldn't expect the future to be one thing.

Eventually, Old Elliott does come back, and finds out Young Elliott has made up her mind about Chad.
Old Elliott is not happy with that decision, but the reason is quite unexpected.
The final ten minutes actually makes the movie work as a coming-of-age flick. Old Elliott finally explains her Chad-a-phobia, and Young Elliott tells her future self what she'll do. The big moment is who meets both Elliotts and SEES THEM CLEARLY.  It's a moment that makes the film special.

Maisy and Aubrey are great together as both sides of the same woman, with te younger self wondering if the future knows what she's talking about. Aubrey's big scene at the end is very good, and Future Aubrey realizes trying to "correct" the past may not help her in 2045.

The movie is mainly off theater screens to make room for Halloween fare, but should be on Prime Video in November

Then, there's the origin story of Donald Trump, where he becomes The Apprentice. Sebastian Stan, who plays Trump and usually a Winter Soldier, said in EW that there is a little Trump in everyone. This is how the Trump we know came into being. The movie shows it's mainly due to notorious lawyer Roy Cohn, played by Jeremy Strong. Seeing both notice each other is very chilling.

At the start, Trump may be VP of his dad's real estate firm, but it's mainly collecting the rent. That's an amusing sight to behold. Trump and Cohn do meet to try to find a way to make housing discrimination charges dropped. Donald does see how ruthless Cohn can be. Trump recoils from this, but not for long. 
From there, the movie shows the slow development of Trump through Cohn's advise and help. He also finds love from a model named Ivana (Maria Bakalova). Cohn isn't sure about this, but lets it happen. It also shows the collapse of Trump's brother Fred Jr,, and hints strongly Donald should have made more of an effort. As Donald becomes more of a success, he leaves people behind. That includes Cohn, who will lose a lot in influence and also his health.

The movie has some interesting comments about Trump seemingly skeptical of getting into politics, and showing ignorance about his health. It mentions his financial problems in passing, but more details about that would made it a stronger movie. 

Both Stan and Strong are just incredible as Trump and Cohn. They could have a good chance at the Oscar race, but they might be crowded out by many other actors who will impress over the holidays.  The fact that The Apprentice has been in very few screens is another factor. It might make a comeback when it hits the streamers, but we shall see. 

One more thing: I was surprised seven other people were there for the one showing the Cinemark Sierra Theater had. They stayed, and seemed to be interested in it. I suspect it will get its money back thanks to streaming over the holidays. there is one movie that will flatter the heck out of him, but it doesn't have a Winter Soldier