Thursday, August 8, 2013

Rifftrax: Hidden Shame of Two Oscar Winners



It's been a while since I bought this Rifftrax VOD feature Firehead, and it's about time to give this movie the significance it deserves:  a lousy movie from 1991 which includes two actors who defied the odds and got Academy Awards.

One of them, of course, is not Chris Lemmon, who's known for being in a Fox sitcom and inspiring the "eight of Chris Lemmon" in two MST3K episodes. This movie also shows he's no Bruce Willis, no matter how hard this movie allegedly tries. He apparently is the friend of Ivan, an Estonian cyborg who refuses to kill his own people when they're protesting ("Be like The Internship movie and bomb!"). Lemmon's with the NIH, and works for some evil rich guy (Christopher Plummer) for some reason. A girl named Mila, who's in "Special Ops" is also brought in as the "love interest", weapons expert, and the unlucky soul who sings the theme song during the closing credits...or is it why she's in the movie at all?

There's also some annoying young girl who knows way too much about science and grand theft auto who has to bail Lemmon out of certain situations. That may be appropriate for sitcoms, but not action movies.

Martin Landau is also part of this movie as a retired military man who warns Lemmon that Vaughn is really part of a shadow group described as a "old-boy clique of perverts". Ivan, meanwhile, explains in "Canadian Chekhov" that he's just getting rid of certain weapons to stop Plummer's evil plans, including killing the President. There's also a scene where Vaughn meets with the Attorney General just after he, uh, does his business against a tree (we hope). When Landau is eventually eliminated, his final words are the best in the whole movie, and may describe everyone who approved it.
There's also an annoying song about Chris Lemmon trying to investigate something while wearing his Yankees hat and pleated pants. It's an indictment about the scene and soundtrack more than anything else.

As for the Rifftrax crew, the riffing is pretty good, but not quite as good as in "Bermuda Triangle". The riffs are pretty fresh, calling the film "Die Hard on a budget", while also getting in digs on Duck Dynasty, The Simpsons, Patton Oswald, Arrested Development, the term "Lemon Party" (look it up on Google, but please not at work), Modern Family, the Terminator movies, Secret Squirrel, and Joe Biden.

I still haven't seen The Apple yet, but that will be done before the big Rifftrax Live event next week.

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