MST3K Goes Beyond Atlantis...And Gender

 

For the first time, Mystery Science Theater 3000 has its first female host...and a female voice for one of the bots.
It's all because Kinga Forrester was told by her (most likely fake) financier from the future to get a second host.
This will be the biggest mistake she'll ever make.
Emily Marsh, as Emily Connor, is that good.

As far as the story goes, Emily installs the Simulator of Love, a virtual version of the Satellite of Love. Thing is, she's with Gizmonic, and it doesn't know she's on the moon. That might be an issue.

Kinga strands her there, and Emily's kind of upset. Still, she quickly settles into her new spot with her simulated versions of Tom Servo (Conor McGiffin) and Crow (Kelsey Ann Brady). She also shows she's very skilled with her invention exchange of Mecha Hands (an advanced version of the Manos Hands from the MST movie).

Now about Crow's new voice...
first, this is a different version of Crow. Of course, it would be different. Some fans in the forums didn't like it because it was screechy. Some didn't like the idea a woman should voice Crow. Some gave her a chance and liked it because of her style. 
Anyone remember how Tom Servo sounded when Kevin Murphy first arrived? He tried to sound like the previous guy, J. Elvis Weinstein. It took time, but he made the voice his own, tossing in some fine singing. Bill Corbett had his transition time when he took on Crow. Kelsey should have the same opportunity. She'll have less of an opportunity this season because of fewer episodes, but she'll get there. 
In fact, in the post-game show, she was quite charming. For more information, check out this thread from the MST3K forums.
Oh, and it seems Emily and Jonah will be plotting something against Kinga and Max. They don't know more people will be coming soon, but we're still not sure about this Kabahl guy.

Oh yeah, the lousy movie...

the show wrapped up its pre-season, or soft open, with Beyond Atlantis. It's a 1973 film where some pearl hustlers from the Philippines discover some big pearls provided by a beautiful blonde named Syrene. They find out she's part of a race of fish people with weird eyes. It's ruled by a guy played by George Nader (yes, the snarky guy from Human Duplicators), who tries to be regal while sitting on a clam. There's also a scientist who wonders if Syrene's tribe is from Atlantis. 
The movie features Patrick Wayne, son of John, who insisted it should be a PG movie. It also has John Ashley, who was in Attack of the the Eye Creatures, and a couple of Rifftrax "gems". He's best known to making movies in the Philippines and making an OK living at it.

There's not much action in the movie until Syrene is told she has to mate with someone to keep the tribe going. The bug-eyed fish people can't do it. She does have sex with one of the pearl divers, but he's interested in the scientist. This leads to an underwater fight that for some reason includes the theme from a British nightly news show. 

This leads to a strange ending that's better left unexplained...which describes a bunch of movies riffed on this show.

Speaking of riffs:

The first appearance of the fish people
The Island of Dr. Matt Groening

East Eddie falls into a crab pit
Sir, that is no way to start the Crab 100 Meter Dash

"When will you mate?" Nereus tells Syrene
After I execute the Queen's Gambit

Syrene has sex with a guy and two fish people lay out something over then
And that's how I net your mother

There's a funeral towards the end
To be fair, this movie makes me want to walk into the ocean, too.

There's also riffs on Venmo, Gary Busey, Russ Meyer, Kato Kaelin and Marty Feldman.

Besides, the host segment that wrapped up the episode made history. It's the first time MST conquered rap music.

Emily also renovated GPC so she can be in more segments. 
Oh, Kinga, what have you done?

Now that the pre-season is over, how will it prepare for the Grand Opening?
It'll present the first three shows in the first weekend in May, then new shows every two weeks. 
People will get a chance to sample an episode for ten bucks, then the option to rent or buy a week later. They can also get three-month subscriptions, too, but it should be interesting how the Gizmoplex channel tries to be accessible to everyone. Ten-dollar tickets may lead to more cash thanks to downloads once people see that the show's turned a corner after a three-year break.

Watch out, Rifftrax Friends!

By the way, the show will have "tributes" to Hobgoblins and Future War during May, then the next movie, Munchie on May 27th.

Rifftrax Revisits a Zombie Nightmare

 

It's been nearly 28 years since Mystery Science Theater 3000 took on a little Canadian horror film best known for having in its cast a future member of Wayne's World, a former TV super hero, and a guy who'll wind up as a popular director. 

That movie was Zombie Nightmare, and Rifftrax decided to take a second look at that cheesy movie.
It's been done several times before with Jack Frost, The Magic Sword, Angel's Revenge, and Final Justice.
While some scenes were cut from the MST version (maybe due to music rights), it does include the scene where one of the teens gets a much deserved fate.

The story is about Tony, a muscular teen played by Jon Mikl Thor (Rock 'N Roll Nightmare). Several years after his dad was stabbed to death after softball practice, Tony breaks up a robbery at the local store. Meanwhile, some rowdy teens are on their way to some dance or other. They wind up running over Tony, killing him. They shrug this off a bit too quickly, especially their leader Jimbo (Shawn Levy, future director of Deadpool 3).

Tony's mom gets Molly, a local voodoo priestess, to resurrect Tony as an act of revenge. One by one, the teens in the car that killed him get killed themselves.

There's a sub-plot, where Police Captain Churchman (Adam West) approaches the series of murders in an odd way. It becomes more clear when he has a bizarre connection to it all.

The Rifftrax version seems to be a bit darker with fewer Batman jokes, but it did comment on bad accents and the low-budget look of the whole thing. They also recycled several jokes from the old version.

So, riff time:

Tony's at bat

MST:  His hair's bouncin' and behavin'
RT:  Valerie Bertinelli at the plate

He's about to be run over

RT:  A car's coming. I better stop right into its path
MST:  Don't worry, his area will protect him

Molly turns him into a zombie

MST:  resurrecting Neil Young
RT:  Like Dracula waking from a wild night in Vegas

Jimbo laughs after two of his friends were killed by "angel dust" aka Tony

MST:  Did you see Russell Baker's column this morning?
RT:  I just stole Jennifer Beals' hair

Then Tony kills Jim's dad

MST:  No need to linger
RT:  Snap into an '80s guy, oh yeah!

Churchman's literally dragged into Hell

RT:  Just don't hurt my mustache
MST:  So Hell is just right there. Yeah, that's you should call before you dig.

There were also jokes on Olive Garden, Alfred Hitchcock, Wayne's World, Tim Horton's, West Side Story, Four Non-Blondes and Encanto.

Both versions of Zombie Nightmare are currently at the Rifftrax website.

MST3K: All Hail Cabal, Then Wonder About Robot Wars

 

This ain't your uncle's Mystery Science Theater 3000, because now the Mads have a boss.

His name is Cabal, who claims he's from the future and is paying Kinga and Max's bills.
He's probably a high-tech fraud, but at least he suggests they get a second host (which is where Emily Marsh comes in). Cabal is played by Baron Vaughn, who also voices Tom Servo. So, is Kabal the second coming of Kevin Murphy except with a aerodynamic hoodie? We shall see.

Aside from that, the second half of the "soft open" gets underway with a showing of Robot Wars. It's about a guy named Drake who operates a scorpion robot that shoots at tanks while carrying passengers. It takes place in 2041, so it's more depressing than, say, Warriors of the Lost World. 
Anyway, he flirts with a passenger who suspects something is hidden under a ghost town called Crystal Valley. It's supposed to be a relic of 1993 (when this movie was made). An Asian guy and a "journalist" get involved, and it's revealed a long-forgotten robot is buried under the town. It soon emerges, setting up the "Robot War" which barely lasts a couple of minutes. The terrible stop-action animation doesn't help either. 

The riffing, however, is a little better than the Santo vs. Dracula movie. The host segments were good, too. It featured Jonah in a dress (yikes), a tour of a 1990's theme park, and a Ted Talk about Drake's buddy Stumpy

Then Kinga and Max wonder how they can get a second host. Thanks to Synthia, they get a solution:

It looks like her first movie will happen in a few weeks.

So, let's get to the riffs:

Drake tries to charm Leda (the nosy passenger)
What's the opposite of a meet cute? Beat you?

Stumpy the sidekick:  What would John Wayne do?
Say something racist?

The buried robot emerges through a parking lot
So that's how Macy's Thanksgiving Parade Balloons are born

Then it's about to fight the Scorpion robot
I'm gonna walk down to Electric Avenue

To their credit, Jonah and the bots riffs through very long closing credits.
Best Boy, why isn't there a Best Girl?

There were also riffs on Scottsdale, Home Depot, Dukes of Hazzard, Joe Frazier, Hamilton and This Island Earth (the MST version). 

Afterwards, there was a pre-taped discussion about the Gizmoplex and why Joel decided on a "soft launch" first. He was joined by Matt McGinnis, Lesley Kinzel and Ivan Askwith. They made some great points about how backers got a chance to see them build the Plex while getting it ready for the grand opening on May 6th. Joel compared it to a basketball team getting some practice time before the season starts. They also wanted the fans to see the process and how that can be very interesting. So far, it's led to some valuable feedback that can be used once everyone else can get a chance to check out the Gizmoplex. 

They also say it's not like Netflix, and that's not the goal here. It's a place where people can be part of MST3K as a fan or backer, or just someone who wonders what they heck it is. They can go with subscriptions or just buy or rent an episode. It's also a chance for other MSTies to share their love for the show, and spread the word. As Joel says, it's kind of like buying a season ticket to live plays or a Best of Broadway series. He also admits he's not trying to compete with other sci-fi franchises like Star Trek, and he shouldn't. MST is all about mocking the genre, especially the low-tech attempts, and that makes it a unique part in our lives and America (AMEN!).

There was also some discussion on how the show changed over the years. It started as a nice way to spend two hours on the Comedy Central, to something really different on SyFy. That channel treated the show as a sci-fi series with plot and stuff, never mind the movie mocking. Now that the show is its own boss, it can be the best of all of its incarnations.

That makes sense. After all, Broadway shows have previews and out-of-town tryouts before Opening Night. This is the same thing.
It's already had an effect. The intermission for the second episode was much shorter compared to Santo, which was basically a long host segment.

Anyway, the next show will be Emily's first with Beyond Atlantis, made in the Philippines. That'll be on the 29th.
Oh, and look who came back...